"The Principle of Covenant Love"pt.3 Ephesians 5:31-33

Introduction

Remember that the Apostle Paul has instructed husbands to love their wives like Christ loves the Church. There is a Christ-centered focus that models the husbands role in relationship to his wife.

Back up in verse 28 Paul says that “in the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.”

We want to remember this contrast that Paul introduces us to in the context because it will help us understand our text this morning as we see that the principle of covenant love is in place in marriage to primarily magnify the glory of Christ in relationship to His Church.

This is why God commissioned marriage in the first place. Look back at your text to verse 31:

I. The Commission (31).

The Principle of Covenant love is establish on the Commission of marriage between a man and a woman.

This should be no surprise to us. As most of us are aware that verse 31 is a quote from Genesis 2:24.

This is where God originally instituted marriage after the creation of Adam and Eve prior to the Fall taking place in Genesis 3.

The institution came in an age of innocence before there was corruption in human nature. Adam and Eve were joined as one before God and there was no corruption in that relationship until the fall came. The marriage was perfect.

Today a husband and wife may long for a perfect marriage but in reality we long for something that we were made for but it will never be realized in this current world. This is because everyone is married to a flawed person, even my wife is married to a flawed person.

We have longing in our marriage relationships because the fall of man has distorted everything about marriage. You may be married to someone that from a human standpoint does a great job being a Christian husband or a Christian wife but there are still flaws in your spouse.

I find it interesting that when God institutes marriage He says “a man shall leave his father and mother.”

God says this in a context to institute marriage in a context where Adam and Eve had no father or mother. This indicates that this was foundational to relationship in marriage in how God ordered the family as a perpetual institution. Marriage and family is not a social construct that had its beginnings in a collaboration of fallen men. Marriage and family was instituted by God for the good and protection of humanity. And in the marriage union He would glorify Christ in His relationship to the Church.

Notice that the husband leaves and is to hold fast to his wife. This idea of “hold fast” is the same term that is used to describe a warrior clutching his sword. It is the notion that he clings so tightly that he refuses to give it up. It is like his sword is an extension of himself. This is what a husband does in marriage. His wife is a part of him and he refuses to give her up. She is an extension of himself that he is to nourish and cherish before God.

The two shall become one flesh further describes the union that a husband has with his wife. That is why Paul says in Ephesians 5:28 that husbands should loves their wives as their own bodies. This is because of the union that exist in marriage. Marriage is two people being one unit in their relationship. We are not talking about two individuals bound into a contract like a business venture but bound relationally as one in marriage before God.

This is described at such a deep relational level because God is using it to make a comparison between what we experience in marriage to something that is mysteriously profound. Look back at verse 32:

II. The Comparison (32).

One side of the comparison is a living metaphor and the other is the ultimate reality that the metaphor is pointing us to.

The metaphor is earthly marriage and the ultimate reality is our eternal union with Christ.

The union is a mystery that is profound to human understanding. Two persons who are mysteriously one in union is hard for us to understand but it is not hard for God. God is three persons in one union of substance.

The Trinity is the divine essence of God in His being. When we think in the physical and material sense we struggle understanding such a profound union. But for God it is His divine essence. I say that to make the point that the union of the Godhead transcends the physical and material and anchors in Spirit.

In other words it goes beyond our ability to comprehend. The Holy Spirit is the one who unites us to Christ. His Spirit is living inside of believers and He works through Christ to bring the decrees of God to pass in our lives at a deeper level than just material or physical.

Remember from Ephesians chapters 1-2: He chose us in Him before the foundations of the world (Eph. 1:4), in Him we have obtained an inheritance (Eph. 1:11), in Him you were sealed with the promised Holy Spirit (Eph. 1:13), we were made alive with Christ (Eph. 2:5), we were raised with Him and we are seated with Him (Eph. 2:6), we were also created in Christ Jesus for good works (Eph. 2:10) and finally, in Him you also are being built together into a dwelling place for God by the Holy Spirit (Eph. 2:22).

Combine what we know theologically of our spiritual union with Christ to the metaphor of marriage, and we have a deeper intimacy than we have ever known in our eternal union with Christ. I can only imagine what that will be like but it is a profound direction that the relational dynamic of the eternal mystery points us towards.

There is no marriage in heaven because as the bride of Christ the church will be married to Him. We won’t need the metaphor any longer because we will have the ultimate reality of the real thing to the glory of God.

We need to realize that marriage in this world is the temporal display of the eternal to come. Husband your role is to reflect Christ in your relationship to your wife to the glory of God. Couples need to keep the eternal implications before you in the relationship of marriage.

This section of Ephesians is not primarily about marriage between a man and a woman but about Christ and the Church.

It is Christological in nature and so are our lives as we live them out on earth. But before we think that Paul is trying to get us to be so heavenly minded that we are no earthly good, or before we think there is nothing practical for us to learn, there is something we need to consider at the horizontal level of our relationship in verse 33:

III. The Consideration (33).

Let each of you husbands love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.

Notice that it doesn’t say do this if they are worthy of it, or if they meet your expectations or if they meet my needs first. I will only say that you husband have the responsibility before God to lead your wife and family in the ways of the Lord. And wives have a responsibility before God to respect her husband.

Here in verse 33 we have a summary restatement of what Paul has already said in verses 22-24 to wives and in verse 25 to husbands.

Marriage is to be lived out primarily to the glory of Christ as a reflection of His relationship to the Church. And the practical and relational components of this is sacrificial love towards the wife and respectful submission towards the husband.

If you are not married but hope to be one day remember this now and recognize the supremacy of Christ over-arching the marriage relationship theologically so you and your future spouse may be driven in your marriage by someone infinitely greater than yourselves.

If you are married and you have gone through the motions of marriage while appealing to Christ with lip service but missing the eternal implications of the Christ-centered focal point, it is never too late to have an encounter with Christ and His supremacy over your marriage.

Conclusion

God wants the absolute best for you and your marriage that is why He created marriage with Christ and the Church in mind. Maybe today is the day that in your marriage there is a new and passionate commitment to your marriage and the glorification of Christ.

Husbands don’t wait for your wife to take the lead on this. Be a courageous man of God and initiate spiritual leadership in your marriage and in your home. Repent from the sin that so easily ensnares you and robs you and your wife and family of the blessings of God over your marriage.

Many men work so hard to give their families material things but fail in working hard to give them the spiritual things. Today is a great day of opportunity for change. Love your wife for the glory of Christ.

Confess and receive His grace.

Unbeliever believe the gospel! Let’s Pray!